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Secondary is changing my little girl…

Secondary is changing my little girl… well, I say little girl, but she’s about to hit 12 and she’s asking me to stop engaging in habits we did, when she was actually a little girl: be they nicknames or games etc etc. (FYI 'little girl' by her stands is when she was 10!)

I’m so glad she has the space and trust to do that with me, but also know she is craving growing up, more so than any child I encountered in my school days or earlier.

The lockdown hit her hard, and I feel it has made her desperate to do everything, anywhere, all the time - I know some children have some anxiety at present, but this one is going the other way: she’s terrified of not doing everything and the chance to do anything not being in her hands again.

Reminds me of children in schools who had glandular fever, they always seemed so determined not to miss out on anything again when they come back.

Anyway, I’m sure parents and teachers are seeing varieties of this in schools and homes across the country and reminds me though COVID’s day-to-day effects are waning or under control, the post-Covid fallout is still to come.

Also reminds me of a line, in one of the best pieces of writing I came across this year, from Honor Jones, in the Atlantic. Honour is talking about the changing nature of the relationship with her husband and subsequent divorce:

“The worst part was that it wasn’t remotely his fault; this is probably exactly what I asked him to do when we were 21 and first in love, even if I never said it out loud. To shelter me from the elements; to be caring and broad-shouldered. But now it was like I was always on my tiptoes, trying to see around him.”

That line: ‘But now it was like I was always on my tiptoes, trying to see around him.’ Really resonates, in reference to what I think with my growing children, but also I guess, when looking back on it, very relevant to leadership too. (do read the whole article, really put:

Thinking about the base you can provide for staff, but then sometimes you become the obstacle to their growth too.

Anyway enough afternoon food for thought- off to ponder who else has to ‘see round me’, and hopefully do something about that.


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